Saturday, June 10, 2017

Learning to speak raccoon language from my new BFF

   My new best friend is James, known locally as the "Critter Getter" guy. Our relationship began a few weeks ago. We've been spending lots of time together at different hours of the day. He's so smart! He knows raccoon sign language, and he's been teaching it to me. I am so lucky to have a friend like James. He texts me to tell me when he's coming over. I gave him my home number too. One night James sat out in front of my house until after midnight. Everyone needs a friend like James.

   Several weeks ago my husband, I will call him John for now, confessed that he had found a pried open vent on the foundation of our house several weeks back, and had repaired it. Husband John knows his wife doesn't like the open freeway under our house for rodents.Wife Lorrie realllllly hates rodents. Good husband John dutifully fixed it and was placing traps to catch any unwelcome intruders. The vent and all subsequent vents were all getting destroyed every night now.Very perplexing so my heroic husband said he would replace each vent with brand spanking new vents to fix this problem once and for all! He worked for hours on this project. I love John. That night one of the vents was pulled open like butter and we weren't sure if something was coming or going out! Husband of the year announced it was time to call in the professionals. This is a great quality of my hero husband John, who knows when to throw up the white flag. Other men could learn this redeeming quality from him! It's my husband's fault though that I now spend so much of my free time with James. He made me call him and told him to come over to our house.

   James is teaching me allllllll about raccoons. He knows them very well as he learned about raccoon language from his father. He says I have a mama raccoon under my house and she has babies now there. James has a special camera he placed to record her coming and going from under my house. I love James. He's so techie. James tells me stories of his adventures with raccoons. He has a large scar on his hand from where he was bit once. James is so brave.

   Everything James has told me about this mama raccoon is true! She is a good mama and returns to her babies after going out late at night for water and food. James says she is the best one to take care of those babies. James says after we separate her from the babies, he will then reunite them (the kits) back to her. She will move them to another safe place. But first he has to fix all the vents with super duper special made vents he has made just for him. Then he puts in a special door that locks behind her at night when she emerges. He made sure she would go in and out it one night just to be sure. James is so patient and careful. He records everything so he can know for sure what mama raccoon is doing. I'm so proud of my new friend who is taking good care of me and my foundation house-guests. Yesterday Mama raccoon,let's call her Rhonda now, after my best friend in college. Rhonda was locked out and tried for hours to break into my house foundation but James made a mistake and didn't screw down the crawlspace door completely! Rhonda then pried it open and found her way back to the babies! Hooray! Wait, this is not good. James feels very badly for his mistake but I forgave him because after all he is my new best friend. James is letting Rhonda recover from the trauma and hopes she will move her babies this weekend. Rhonda is being recorded on camera thanks to James. I love James.

   James is teaching me about a mother raccoons unbending love. He is also teaching me to be very very careful with my dog around  Rhonda. So far they haven't met. He is teaching me about being patient. He's trying to save me money too by hoping she moves the babies herself and he won't have to go searching for them under the bowels of my home. One thing he didn't teach me, but I  gleaned on my own... is for me to give his business card to my neighbors. Rhonda will be moving in next week to their house!

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